???Stupid Mary??????

Okay I know I said I have to work but I have to tell you one last funny story.?? This is from last Friday or something, but it’s funny enough that it’s still worth telling.?? So, on Friday-or-whenever-it-was, I was doing the mail near the end of the day which is one of my normal perfunctory job duties.?? And after I printed up and stuffed and sealed all the envelopes, I realized that my boss’ initials hadn’t printed in the upper corner above the return-address like they’re supposed to (to indicate which attorney should be billed for the cost of the postage, in case you were wondering) and I realized it’s because I had had it set to “omit return address” since I had printed up some envelopes for her son to have his teachers send their college recommendation forms in – so anywho, it had been stuck on “omit” so I had to go through this big ole pile of mail and write in her initials on them all, and in my split-second realization of this fact and the annoyance that ensued, well, I started muttering annoyedly.?? Except here are 2 crucial factors: #1 I was too spastic to finish my muttered sentence, and #2 I was walking between my coworker’s open cubicle and my boss’ open office door at the time of said muttering incident.?? So what in my head was supposed to be an INTERNAL monologue of mild annoyance, expressed IN MY HEAD as “Darnit, stupid Mary’s initials didn’t print and now I have to do it all by hand”, turned out like this:

??ME: Walking by my boss’ open office door, muttering loudly…. “Stupid Mary….”

??MARY, my boss:?? Ex-CUSE me, Virginia?

ANN, my coworker:?? WHAT did you just say?

??ANN and MARY cackle loudly.

MARY:?? Well, that’s just the last straw, Virginia!

ANN:?? I can’t believe you just said that!?? HAHAHAHAHAHAH

ME, flustered, blushing, still muttering: No, I – I didn’t mean – that wasn’t my whole thought – I – in my head, that – ah, shut up, shut up!


Seriously, I sounded like SUCH a HEAD CASE!?? Ann is still teasing me about it, and it’s been almost a whole week. I called my boss stupid, to her face, on accident.?? She’s really a very intelligent woman.?? Who clearly has awful taste in staff.?? WHAT is my DEAL?! haha, at least they have good senses of humor, those gals…

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