My top ten pet peeves list for Tuesday

1.?? Mice in my attic!

2.?? People who talk on cell phones loudly in places where other people are clearly there to sleep and/or read and it is an obvious QUIET zone.

3.?? Caramel apple cider ??? give me a break!?? Cider, caramel, AND whipped cream??? How about a frappadiabetieschino??? Sheesh.

4.?? Long long long lines to buy silly things, like sandwiches.

5.?? Carcinogens.?? Seriously, everything gives you cancer.?? Teflon pans give you cancer, aluminum cookware gives you Alzheimers, drinking from Nalgenes while breastfeeding makes your baby’s testicles not drop on time, antibacterial handwash?? when combined with the chlorine in tapwater forms the carcinogenic compound chloroform, microwaving food in plastic releases toxins, deodorant makes your babies turn green, sodium lauryl sulfate makes you go blind, breathing makes you fat.?? Seriously, everything is bad for you.?? When does it end??? And to top it off, a lot of these really are valid concerns, and a lot of them are stupid bullshit internet hoaxes, and sorting out the former from the latter (while a hidden passion and, I think, talent, of mine) gives you a headache the size of the tumor you got from washing your hands with dish soap.?? Sweet jesus.

6.?? Shin splints.

7.?? People neglecting to cut the little thread cross that keeps a vent/pleat closed on the back of their coats/jackets/skirts.?? People!?? Open your vents, please!?? I always have to the urge to inform them of such, but I don???t want to offend a stranger, so I only ever would say anything if it were someone I knew ??? but I would WANT to know if my stupid vent was sewn shut all stupid-looking.?? Feel free to tell me, strangers, if my vent is sewn shut.?? I’ll thank you for it.

8.?? Awkward phone conversations.

9.?? Make that phones, period.?? And email.?? Really, I don???t like messenger programs either.?? You know what method of communication I like best, if you can???t see people in person??? WRITING LETTERS.?? I???m not kidding.?? I like letter writing better than any other means of communication.?? And I don???t mean on computers ??? handwritten, wax-sealed envelopes.?? Hell, I???d dip a quill in an inkpot if I had either of those two things.?? As it is I write with a fountain pen.?? So, I???m my grandmother, basically.

10.?? Waking up all grumpy and whiny and on the wrong side of the bed for no apparent reason.


I promise I???ll write a happier entry later.?? Hmph.

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