Should we start calling them ???uncomfortable silence rooms??? instead?

I just have to say, I am in full agreement with the Craigslist best-of poster who gave women permission to actually go to the bathroom when in the bathroom [1]. I just came back from the stupidest, weirdest, strangest, and awkwardest (okay, most awkward, sheesh, incurred the wrath of the squiggly red lines) bathroom experience EVER. I had taken less time than usual to eat, read, return library books, and make cell phone calls, so I had about 15 min. to kill before my lunch break was technically over ??? and Lord knows I wasn???t going back to my desk so my robot Stress-O-Matic boss could milk me dry. So I strolled to Floor 40 bathroom (known amongst most Bank of America Tower [2] patrons as ???the nice bathroom???) to, ya know, go to the bathroom, plus reapply my makeup and do something about the God-awful hair day I???m having (yes, it???s not just bad, it???s God-awful today). So, I do my thing in the stall, and come out and start with the hand-washing, followed by a tooth-brushing to cleanse the palate before the berry-flavored Kiehl???s lip gloss went on [3], and ONLY THEN do I realize someone???s been sitting in one of those stalls COMPLETELY SILENTLY for the entire 5-7 minutes I???ve already been there. WTF? I flushed, washed, and brushed ??? there were plenty of water-related noise-masking moments during which you could have made whatever noise you were so scared to make in my presence. THEN Mystery Stall Occupant #4 [4] had to sit through 10 minutes of me putting on makeup and fiddling with my unruly hair, all the while sitting there COMPLETELY SILENT with her pants around her ankles. So dear #4, I ask of you: wouldn???t it have just been easier for us both if you actually just WENT? I promise I wouldn???t have been offended, being as how it is, after all, a bathroom. WTF.


[2] Oops, now known as the Columbia Center as of Monday ??? but why didn???t they change it back to the Columbia TOWER? Why the Columbia CENTER? Why are they INTENTIONALLY trying to confuse people EVEN MORE? I shall continue to refer to it as the Axis of Evil until this theory is firmly disproven. Fine, disproved. Damn you, squiggly red lines!

[3] I hate the flavor (& flavored lip-things in general for that matter), but the color is so flattering it???s worth it.

[4] Because she was in the fourth stall, see.


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