“You will have a prosperous month.”

Lucky bunniesThose Chinese fortune cookie messages used to be so dull. Even when it was good news, it was either devoid of creativity, or imposed with some lame time restriction.

“You will have a good day tomorrow.” Seriously, we got that one a few months ago. WTF? Not even a good WEEK? And how about “next Thursday”? I’d be even more impressed if I were given a specific date. And “You are surrounded by many good friends” seems less like a fortune and more like an observation, you know? Which is more creepy than uplifting when it comes from a cookie.

But Grant and I got some surprisingly comforting and insightful scraps of corporate-manufactured prophecy the other night — so much so that I immortalized them in Scotch tape. Let’s take a closer look at those messages, shall we?

VA: “You have remarkable power which you are not using.”

Grant: “You will never need to worry about a steady income.”

Given our recent combined nine months of unemployment, plus rumblings of change on the horizon at his work, it’s nice to be reassured via tasteless confectionary messages that we’re gonna be OK.

(And as an aside, the bunny place cards are from Hen’s Easter dinner, but they only felt appropriate since Grant is a rabbit in Chinese astrology. “The luckiest of all the signs”, so they say.)

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